He was in that state where you’re not quite asleep and not quite awake. I tried to wake him, but found that I couldn’t form words that would mean anything. He sat upright in the bed and called out my name. He couldn’t hear my answer.
I felt again the pain of being separated from him. His face looked as if he were struggling to remember something.
He turned away to reach for something on the bedside table. I wanted to say, “Please, no, Michael, don’t turn your back on me.” I heard him pull out the drawer. I wondered what he could be looking for at this hour of the night.
He went into the bathroom. I sat on the corner of the bed nearest the window and contemplated the rug. I remembered the weekend in Pennsylvania when I talked him into buying it. I don’t think he ever liked the shaggy old thing, but he hasn’t had time to make changes yet.
I thought of the last time we spoke—his phone call from Milan. It was Saturday morning there, still Friday night here. I wasn’t ready to answer his question, but if I could talk to him now, I wouldn’t hesitate.
Oh God, how I wish I could say “yes.”
When he came back to bed, I could have sworn he was looking right at me as his eyes filled with tears.
Note: The assignment was to write about “saying ‘yes.’” I have been looking for a chance to return to the story fragment that I started in the February “Start to Finish II” workshop.
March 25, 2008—See also Exercise #49.
© 2008 Edward F. Gumnick
Excellent return! It helped me to go back and reread the original too, but I liked it on its own as well. So now we are hearing Sarah’s point of view, as a ghost, lamenting the things that were never said. How interesting this would be as a back-and-forth story. His point of view, then hers, then his again, etc. The living then the ghost as each struggles with separation and loss and moving on. This could be a great short or even novella length. I definitely want to read this whole story someday.
Dagnabbit, you’ve caught up with me again. I guess I’d better get to writin’.
As the self-appointed cheerleadeer, it is my job to keep cheering you on, even if that sometimes feels like a stick I am beating you with.
You are doing great – I mean you are up to 42 stories! Who would have thought that you would keep it up all the way to the end? You are 8 stories away from completion!!
In other words, get cracking.